凡

道

字

，

重

且

舒

fan

dao

zi

zhong

qie

shu

凡是

說

話

穩重

而且

舒長和緩

whenever

to say

words

to be dignified

and

at a leisure pace

無論說什麼話，都要莊重而和緩。
When you speak you should say the words clearly with a dignified manner and at a leisurely pace. 

勿

急

疾

，

勿

模

糊

wu

ji

ji

wu

mo

hu

不要

急促

匆忙

不要

不清楚

含混夾雜

do not

in a hurry

quickly

do not

blurry

muddled

不要匆促急忙，不要含糊籠統。
Do not rush through your sentences or make ambiguous statements.

彼

說

長

，

此

說

短

bi

shuo

chang

ci

shuo

duan

那個人

優點

這個人

缺點

that one

to talk about

long points

this one

to talk about

short points

那個人議論誰的長處，這個人批評誰的短處。
That person talks about others’ good points and this person speaks about others’ faults.

不

關

己

，

莫

閒

管

bu

guan

ji

mo

xian

guan

關係

自己

不要

多餘

過問、插手

not

concerning

oneself

do not

in a meddlesome

to get involved

只要是和自己不相關的，都不要去管這些閒事。
If something is none of your business, it is best not to get involved.

要與人維持良好的關係，不但內在要誠信，外在也要有技巧。外在要有怎樣的技巧呢？這可從講話的語氣、聲調和講話的態度兩方面來講。

If you want to maintain good relations with people, not only do you have to be sincere, you also have to be tactful. What does tact consist of? We can discuss it in terms of the tone of voice and the attitude of speaking. 

本章頭兩句是說﹕無論說什麼話，都要「重且舒」。這是說講話的態度，要莊重而和緩，但是也可以把它解釋成語氣要有重音，聲調也要悠長。接下來的兩句，講話不要匆促急忙，也正是呼應前面所說的，講話的態度要莊重和緩；講話不要含糊籠統，也正是說講話的語氣要有重音，聲調也要悠長。

The first verse says that no matter what you are saying, you should speak with a dignified manner and at a leisurely pace. That is, your manner when speaking should be earnest and genial. Another explanation is that you should use correct emphasis and pronounce clearly. The next verse says that you should not rush through your sentences, which corresponds to being earnest and genial. Nor should you mumble or garble your words, which corresponds to speaking with correct emphasis and pronouncing clearly.

從一個人講話的態度，固然可以馬上看出他的教養；從他講話的語氣、聲調，更可以馬上看出這個人的心情是好是壞，或緊張鬆，而善於相人的，聽他的聲音，還可以判斷出這個人的性情與命運。

From the way a person speaks, one can immediately determine the way he was brought up. From his tone of voice, one can detect whether he is in a good mood or a bad one, and whether he is tense or relaxed. Those skilled in physiognomy can also read a person's disposition and fate from hearing his voice.

中國春秋時代，楚國的令尹（相當於宰相的官職）公子子文是個出名的賢人。當他的弟弟司馬（大將軍，相當於國防部長）子良得了個兒子越椒，令尹子文就去看這新生兒，未到屋內，,聽見嬰兒的哭聲，他不由皺起了眉頭，等看過了嬰兒，令尹子文就對司馬子良說﹕「這孩子不可以把他養大！他生成一副熊虎的樣子，聲音又像豺狼嚎叫，這是心性殘忍的大凶之人；你如果把他養大了，他將會導至我們若敖氏這一家族覆滅。俗話說﹕『狼子野心。』這是一匹會吃人的狼啊！怎麼可以養他？」子良不同意這麼做，子文就起了很大的憂慮。到他老了快死的時候，他召集了族人來，說﹕「如果越椒當權主政時，你們一定要趕快搬離，以免惹上災。」一面忍不住哭了起來﹕「我們若敖氏的祖先恐怕要沒有子孫奉祀了哇！」

During the Spring and Autumn Period in China, Zi Wen, the prime minister of the State of Chu, was renowned for his virtue. When his younger brother, General Zi Liang, had his son Yue Jiao, Minister Ziwen went to visit the newborn baby. Before entering the room, he heard the baby cry, raised his brows, and after seeing the baby, said to General Zi Liang, "You must not raise this boy. He has the looks of a bear or tiger, and his voice sounds like a jackal's howl. He is cruel and vicious. If you raise him, he will bring disgrace to our Ruo Ao clan. He has the wild, ambitious heart of a wolf. He's a man-eating wolf. How can you raise him?" When Zi Liang did not agree with him, Zi Wen became very worried. When he was old and near death, he summoned his kinsmen and told them, "If Yue Jiao ever comes to power, you must quickly move away to avoid calamity." He couldn't help but weep as he said, "The ancestors of Ruo Ao may not have any descendants left to worship them!"

子文死後，兒子鬥般繼任令尹，後來越椒也繼父位做了司馬，越椒就謀同他的部屬伯贏殺掉鬥般，自立為令尹，並封伯贏做司馬；不久越椒又忌諱伯贏的勢力，索性發動若敖家族的兵力，圍殺伯贏，更一不做二不休地攻打起楚王。楚王要求講和，願意用三個王子做人質，可是越椒並沒答應，楚王只好和若敖家開戰。越椒仗著藝高人膽大，兩次發箭射楚王，竟然都沒射中，軍隊就有了怯意。楚王利用這機會，鼓舞自己的部隊說﹕「先王當年征服息國時，獲得三支神箭，被越椒偷去兩支，現在他已經沒有了，我們可以反攻了！」一時士氣大振，於是滅掉了若敖氏一家。

After Zi Wen died, his son Dou Ban inherited his position as minister. Later when Yue Jiao inherited his father's position as general, he plotted with his subordinate, Bai Ying, to murder Dou Ban and usurp the minister's position for himself, making Bai Ying the general. Shortly afterwards Yue Jiao became envious of Baiying's power, so he dispatched the Ruo Ao clan's troops to ambush and kill him. Then he went on and attacked the King of Chu. The King of Chu wanted to reach a settlement and offered three of his princes as hostage, but Yue Jiao did not agree, so he had no choice but to go to battle with the troops of Ruo Ao. Although Yue Jiao was bold and skilled in archery, when both of the arrows he shot at the King of Chu missed their target, his troops lost confidence. The King of Chu took advantage of their hesitation and urged his own troops on, saying, "When our ancestral king conquered the country, he obtained three divine arrows. Yue Jiao stole two of them, but now he's lost them and we can counter-attack." In a burst of bravado, they annihilated the Ruoao clan. 

幸好當時子文有個孫子正奉派出使齊國，在回程中聽見亂事，不顧他人好意勸阻，仍然回國交差，並且綁了自己，到司敗（大法官，相當於司法部長）那兒待罪。楚王想到子文治理楚國的功勞，便說﹕「假若讓子文這樣的賢人就此絕了後代，如何能鼓勵人向善呢？」於是乎赦免他的罪，又恢復他的官職，若敖一家才沒有完全絕種。

It just so happened that one of Zi Wen’s grandsons had been away in the State of Qi on a diplomatic mission. On his way home he heard about the fighting, and not listening to the friendly advice of others, he returned home to report on his mission, then tied himself up and went to the head judge to receive his punishment. The King of Chu, thinking of Zi Wen's merit in governing the State of Chu, said, "If a person as worthy as Zi Wen had no descendants left, how could later generations be inspired to goodness?" Thereupon the King granted him amnesty and allowed him to retain his position. In that way, the Ruo Ao clan was not completely wiped out.

西漢末年，有個篡漢自立為帝的王莽。在王莽還未竊國之前，他總是裝得很謙恭文雅，因此瞞過很多人。有一回，一個走江湖賣藝的人應召入宮表演；有人就問他王莽的相貌好不好？這走江湖的人就品論說﹕「他是個鴟梟眼、老虎嘴，又豺狼聲的人，所以不但會吃人，最後也終將被人所殺！」果然王莽在弒帝篡漢之後，終於又敗亡，由光武帝中興了漢朝，是為東漢。

At the end of the Western Han dynasty, Wang Mang usurped the throne and made himself King. Before he became a traitor, he had always put on a pretense of humility and refinement, and he fooled many people. Once, a street hawker was invited into palace to perform. Someone asked him, "What do you think of Wang Mang's physiognomy?" The hawker said, "He has the eyes of a horned owl, the mouth of a tiger, and the voice of a jackal. Not only will he eat men, he will be murdered in the end!" As it turned out, after Wang Mang killed the Han Emperor and usurped the throne, he was eventually defeated by Emperor Guangwu, who established what became the Eastern Han Dynasty.

從這兩個例子來看，人的聲音，真的就是性情的反射。但是天生的性情，是可以用後天的教化和陶冶來改變的；只要性情改變，聲音也自然隨之而變，以後的命運也就不同了。所以從講話的態度和聲調來約束訓練孩子，實在是不容忽視的造命之學，不要認為那沒有什麼關係。

These two examples show that a person's voice is a true reflection of his disposition. However, one's inborn disposition may be altered by education and training. One's voice will naturally change along with one's disposition, and one's fate will also be different! Therefore, we must not overlook the method of changing fate through training children in their manner of speech and tone of voice and think that it is not important.

美國華盛頓總統年輕時抄錄的「國民應對手則」中，還有一條說﹕「不要好奇地探聽他人的事，也不要接近在私下交談的人。」這意思就是教人不要好管閒事，不要做「包打聽」，以免惹出更多是非，甚至招來殺身之禍。別人的閒話尚且不應當聽，更別提說人閒話了！

When U.S. President George Washington was a youth, one of the rules he copied from "Rules of Civility in Conversation Amongst Men" was, "Don't listen to other people's affairs out of curiosity; don't approach people who are engaged in private conversation." In other words, don't mind other people's business. Don't be an eavesdropper, or you might stir up more gossip and even put your life in danger. You shouldn't listen to gossip, much less utter it. 

「國民應對手則」中又說﹕「不要背後說人閒話，因為這是不公正的。」不知真相究竟，就說東說西，豈止是對當事者不公正而已，對自己的人格更是一大傷害！孔子當年遊周，看見太廟前有金人銅像的口，被繩索繞了三圈封起來，後面又刻著﹕「這是古代言語謹慎的人。」不由讚歎不已；從此「三緘其口」，就成了慎言的成語了。所以明智的人總是惜話如金，這是很有道理的。

The "Rules of Civility in Conversation Amongst Men" also says, "Don't gossip about others behind their backs, because that's unfair." If you don't know the truth of the matter and you speak recklessly, not only are you being unfair to those involved, you are also degrading yourself. In his travels, Confucius once came upon a bronze statue in front of a temple. The statue's mouth had been gagged three times around with rope, and on its back were carved these words: "This is a man from ancient times who was cautious in speech." Confucius praised this sight endlessly, and from that incident came the expression, "to be gagged thrice," meaning to be scrupulous in speech. Wise people guard their words like gold, which is a very sensible way to act.

孝事父母，當願眾生，
善事於佛，護養一切。

《大方廣佛華嚴經•淨行品》

When I serve my parents in filial piety,
I vow that living beings.
Will serve the Buddhas skillfully.
And protect and nourish everything.
--Pure Conduct Chapter, Flower Adornment Sutra

中國有一部《孝經》，經上說﹕「夫孝，天之經也，地之義也，民之行也。」孝道是中國傳統的美德，是個人立身處世的根本，也是執政者治理天下的準則。古代聖明的帝王是怎樣教化人民，使天下人順從的呢？不是用嚴刑峻法，也不是用堅兵厚利，而是以德行和道理，使人民自然相親相愛，尊卑長幼都沒有怨恨。所以孔子說孝道，是所有德行的根本，也是一切教化產生的根源。

In China there is a Classic of Filial Piety, which says, "As for filial piety, it is the heavenly mandate, the earthly morality, and the practice of the people." Filial piety is an excellent virtue that has traditionally been honored in China. It is the basis for our life and our relationship with the world, as well as a guideline and standard for governing the nation and world. How did the sage emperors of old influence the people and win their loyalty? It wasn't through the use of harsh punishments or laws, nor through the use of a strong army or generous rewards; rather, it was by means of virtue and reason that they caused the people naturally to be kind and affectionate, so that there was no resentment between the superior and the subordinate, or between the older and younger generations. Hence Confucius said, "Filial piety is the basis of all virtuous deeds; it is also the source from which all teachings emerge."

平等的孝順

IMPARTIAL FILIAL PIETY

《孝經》和《論語》是儒家流傳最廣的典籍。在古代五刑（墨、劓、剕、宮、大辟）所屬的犯罪條例，有三千條之多，其中沒有比不孝的罪行更大的。在宋仁宗時代，《孝經》更列入科舉考試項目中，宋朝忠臣因此特別多。北史《儒林傳》何妥中記載﹕「納言蘇威嘗言於上曰﹕『臣先人每誡臣云﹕唯獨《孝經》一卷，足可立身經國，何用多為。』」在漢明帝、唐玄宗時代，皇帝甚至批注《孝經》，詔令天下誦習，可以暸解中國人對孝道重視的程度。

The Classic of Filial Piety and the Confucian Analects are the most well-known texts of Confucian philosophy. In ancient times, of the more than three thousand offenses meriting the five severe punishments (tattooing, cutting off the nose, cutting off the feet, castration, and capital punishment), none was considered worse than being unfilial. During the reign of Emperor Ren of the Song Dynasty, the Classic of Filial Piety became one of the texts covered in the imperial examination. As a result, the Song Dynasty had a particularly large number of loyal ministers. In the He Tuo Chapter of the Northern History's Annals of Scholars, it is recorded, "Su Wei once said to the Emperor: My late father often admonished me, saying: The study of the Classic of Filial Piety alone provides a sufficient basis for one's life and for the managing of the nation's affairs; what need is there to study additional texts?"' During the reigns of Emperor Ming of the Han Dynasty and Emperor Xuan of the Tang Dynasty, those emperors even wrote commentaries on the Classic of Filial Piety and instructed all the people to recite and practice it. From this we can see what importance the Chinese place upon filial piety.

那麼孝順父母，該怎麼做呢？《孝經•士章》說，拿事奉父親的心去事奉母親，其愛心是相同的；拿事奉父親的心去事奉君王，其尊敬的心是相同的。事奉母親，是取其愛心；事奉君王，是取其敬心；而愛心、敬心二者兼有的，則是事奉父親的道理。

What is considered being respectful to our parents? The section of the Classic of Filial Piety that talks about being a good official says, "In serving your mother, the love you show towards her should be the same as that shown to your father; in serving your superior, the respect you pay to him should be as much as that you pay to your father. Therefore, emphasizing love towards your father is the way of serving your mother and emphasizing respect is the way of serving your superior. That is to say having both love and the respect is exactly the way of serving your father."

對父母的孝順，要怎樣才算盡孝呢？《詩經•小雅、小宛篇》上說﹕「夙興夜寐，無忝爾所生。」是不是這樣就夠了呢？在《孝經•紀孝行章》提到侍奉父母還應注意：居上位的，不要驕傲自大；居下的，不要為非作亂；在同事之間，應和順不可爭奪……。騙、亂、爭三惡若不能除去，讓父母時時擔憂，即使每天用牛羊豬三牲去奉養父母，仍算是不孝順啊！也就是說改掉自己的惡習，就是孝順。

What do you have to do to be considered filial to your parents? The Xiaoya Xiaowan Chapter in the Book of Odes says, "From the time you rise in the morning till you retire at night, do nothing that would bring disgrace to those who gave birth to you." Is that enough? The section of the Classic of Filial Piety that talks about filial conduct says, "In serving your parents, you should also pay attention to the following: If in a high position, do not be arrogant and conceited； if in a subordinate position, do not commit offenses and incite rebellion; get along with your colleagues and avoid contention... If you cannot avoid the three evils of arrogance, rebellion, and contention, causing your parents to worry constantly about you, then even if you served beef, mutton, and pork to your parents every day, you would not be considered filial!" In other words, filial piety consists of changing your own bad habits.

孝事父母時，要想到善事於佛，因為父母賜給我們身體生命，佛卻救度我們的慧命；將事奉父母的愛心和敬心來事奉於佛，夙興夜寐，早起晚睡，勤謹工作，無忝爾所生，不要侮辱了生育你慧命的父母。那麼，孝順佛這樣就夠了嗎？如果你驕慢、爭鬥、貪吝種種的習氣毛病，老也不改，還是讓佛替你擔憂，仍算是不孝順啊！

When serving your parents in filial piety, you should also do a good job in serving the Buddhas, for while our parents have given us our physical bodies and lives, the Buddhas rescue our wisdom life. We ought to use the same affection and reverence with which we serve our parents to serve the Buddhas, rising early and retiring late, working diligently, and not doing anything that would bring disgrace to the parents of our wisdom-life, that is, the Buddha. Is that all we have to do to be filial to the Buddhas? If you still don't change your old habits of arrogance, contention, greed, and other faults, you will cause the Buddhas to worry about you, and how can that be considered filial piety?

孝順是一切佛經道理的本源，地藏王菩薩往昔就是一個孝順的婆羅門女；目連尊者為救生母離餓鬼道，請佛救度，而有盂蘭盆法會。在佛教中，殺父殺母，和出佛身血一樣，是屬於五逆重罪，要墮無間地獄。

Filial piety is the source of all the Buddha's Sutras. In a former life, Earth Store Bodhisattva was a filial Brahman woman. Venerable Maudgalyayana, wishing to free his mother from the path of hungry ghosts, went to ask the Buddha to rescue her, an thus the Ullambana Ceremony came about. In Buddhism, killing one's father and killing one's mother, along with shedding the Buddha's blood, are classified among the Five Rebellious Offenses that merit falling into the Unintermittent Hells.

一個不孝事父母的人，想要祈福，是無有是處的。

If a person who is not filial to his parents prays for blessings, there is no way he or she will obtain them.

佛陀時代，在羅閱祇園有一個人，為人兇惡愚昧，不孝父母，欺壓善良，不敬尊長，家道衰落，多不如意事，因此，便去事奉火神，希望求得火神的褔祐。

In the Buddha's time, there was an evil and foolish person in Rajagriha who was unfilial to his parents, cheated good people, did not respect his elders, caused his family to fall into ruin, and had all kinds of bad luck. He decided to go worship the fire spirit in order to seek its protection.

事奉「火神」的方法，就是當太陽剛剛要落山時，點燃一堆大火，向火光跪拜，直到深更半夜火熄為止。他這樣拜火拜了三年，生活還是沒有什麼改善，又改變信仰去事奉「日月」之神。

The method of worshipping the fire spirit involved lighting a big fire at the time of sunset and making prostrations to it until midnight, when the fire was extinguished. He worshipped in this way for three years, but there was no improvement in his lifestyle, so then he began to worship the sun-moon spirit instead to go worship the fire spirit in order to seek its protection.

事奉「日月」之神方法是﹕白天太陽出來向太陽膜拜，夜裡月亮升空向月亮膜拜；直到太陽落山，月亮西沉為止。他這樣也拜了三年，仍然得不到褔祐，就又再改事天神，每天燒香對著天空跪拜，同時擺上香花美酒、臘肉、豬羊牛隻，想要獲福。這樣經年累月，終於耗盡家財，弄得貧窮不堪，當然也沒得到什麼好處。他為了拜天，弄得辛苦憔悴，病得不能出門。他聽說舍衛國有一位佛陀，是所有天神所崇敬的，想想應該去事奉他，這樣一定會獲得褔祐。

The method of worship involved making prostrations to the sun at sunrise, and making prostrations to the moon when it ascends into the sky at night, bowing continuously until the sun sets behind the mountains, and the moon sets in the west. He bowed like this for three years, but still didn't receive any blessings or protection, so he changed to worshipping the heaven spirit. Every day he lit incense and made prostrations to the heavens, making offerings of fresh flowers, fine wine, and dried pork, mutton, and beef, hoping to obtain blessings. In bowing to the heavens, he wore himself out until he was too sick to leave his house. Then he heard that there was someone known as the Buddha in Shravasti, whom all the heaven spirits worshipped. He thought he ought to go worship Him as well, for it would certainly bring him blessings.

他便來到舍衛國，見到了佛陀，他便訴說自己九年來的經過，如今皈依佛，希望佛陀賜福給他。

He went to Shravasti and met the Buddha, and told the Buddha what he had been doing for the past nine years, saying that now that he had met the Buddha, he hoped the Buddha could bestow blessings upon him.

佛陀告訴他說﹕「祭神求褔報，日後觀收穫，四分不得一，不如敬賢善。能為善謙誠，常敬長和上，四褔自增多，健康長壽安。」──《法句譬喻經•述千品十七》

The Buddha told him, "If you worship spirits hoping for blessings, you will find that you will not gain even a quarter of what you put in. It would be better to venerate good and worthy people. If you can be virtuous, humble, and sincere, always respecting your elders and seniors, the four blessings will naturally increase and you will enjoy health, longevity, and peace." (Chapter 17 of the Dharmapada Sutra)

一個不孝父母，不敬長老的人，是不可能獲得褔祐的。佛教把一切眾生看作是過去世的父母。「是男子皆是我父，是女子皆是我母。」將孝道擴大了，這是一種平等的孝順，不只孝順自己的父母，更達到三世一切父母，以一種平等心，這可以說是孝道最極致的境界了。

A person who is unfilial to his parents and disrespectful to his elders cannot possibly attain blessings and protection. In Buddhism, we consider all living beings to be our parents from past lives. " All men have been my fathers. All women have been my mothers." The scope of filial piety is expanded and becomes an impartial filial piety directed not only towards our own parents in this life, but towards all our parents in the past, present, and future. This kind of impartial spirit could be said to be the utmost state of filial piety.