師父上人、法師、各位來賓和同學們：
大家都可能知道我這個校友，以前在聖城住了六年，現在念完了大學回來教書。關於我為什麼回來，大家可能對我有些期待或建議，我應該當作什麼樣的模範給學生等等。但是，我今晚不講你對我的看法，只想簡單坦白地說說我的感想。
當我是這邊的學生時，我真覺得聖城的日子很辛苦。這些困難不只是生理上或情感上的，而是精神上的。
當然生理上和情感上的困難也是有的，有些人誤會，認為聖城是修行的道場，跑到這裡來了就可以把所有外面惡劣的問題統統解決掉。其實，要解決自己的困難並不是依靠外在的環境，而是看你自己有沒有足夠的勇氣和智慧來改變自己。上人說過，聖城的生活是一種磨煉，可以有更多的機會來改變你的性格和品德。回想起來，我覺得這些都沒有辦法表達我對爸媽當年送我來聖城念書的感恩。
在聖城的那幾年，我所學到的事情多過於我所期望的。聖城外面的世界有許多誘惑，例如電視、電影等等的娛樂，往往讓我們非常容易沉溺於這些東西，忘了我們還有更重要的事情要做。有些人認為娛樂就是最好的解決方法，其實那是一種逃避。最根本的解決方法是瞭解自己的習氣毛病，從那裡開始著手。當然年輕嘛，我是愛玩的，在玩的同時我也會有限度，做任何的事情都要學會中庸之道。我將我在聖城所學到的東西，運用在我的生活裡，所以當境界來臨時，我可以知道怎麼樣面對那些問題。
所有我在這裡的經驗，都促成我發展了我稱之為「內在價值的核心及信仰」，或可稱之為「對自己的信仰」，是不易為外界因素動搖的。值得一提的是，我有信心在這個孤立的佛教寺院裡的生活經驗中所學到的，卻可以運用到我日常生活中的每一方面，不只一次，而是每一次每一次。這裡有一首詩，是Rudyard Kipling寫的，我想與你們分享。這是我在聖城讀十年級時學的，這首詩給了我深刻的感觸，也表示出我在那段日子所學到的生活態度。
當別人不瞭解你，責怪你時，
你依然可以做好自己的本份。
當別人否定你時，
你依然可以堅持該有的原則，
還不去責怪他人。
當你想要成功時，
你需要足夠的耐心和毅力。
當別人撒謊時，你不參與；
當別人恨你時，你不計較，
但不要自以為是，也不要耍小聰明。
你可以編織夢想，
但不要讓它成為你的主人。
你可以思考，但不要讓你的思想左右你。
你在面對成功與失敗時，
你可以用同樣的心情去面對。
當別人扭曲你事情的真相時，
你依然可以承受。
當你付出一切精力，卻遭受打擊時，
你可以重新站起來。
當你在一夜之間失去了所有的一切，
你依然可以重新來過，不怨天尤人。
當你肌能衰退時，
你依然告訴自己，「我要活下去」，
就算只剩下那麼一點的意念，
我都要告訴自己，「撐著！」
當你和卑賤的人相處時，
可以維持自己的德行，
當你和貴族的人相處時，
不會看不起卑賤的人。
當你在面對敵人或朋友時，
能以正確的心態去對待。
當別人跟從你，給你權力時，
你不濫用權力。
時間是無情的，我們要珍惜光陰；
當你能在最短的時間內，
把份內的事做到最好，
那你就可以擁有全世界。
更重要的是，你成為了一個成功的人！
我們的學校處在一個與世隔絕的佛教寺院，現代消費社會所有的點綴品一概不見，但就是在這樣的環境中，讓我認識了我生命中最重要的核心是什麼，讓我學習了如何建設內在的力量，及必要的自信，用來應對我生命中可能遇到的障礙；就是在這樣的環境，我學習了所有必備的條件及價值觀念，協助我有一個成功的人生，特別重要的，還是讓我學會把人做好。記得大概十六歲那時，有一陣子我覺得只要讓我到外面進公立學校念書，跟外面與我同齡的青少年一樣，那我所有的一切問題就都解決了。現在回想起來，就是因為我跟他們不一樣，所以我現在不像他們那樣。
校友介紹：
林內華，聖城培德女中1997年畢業，柏克萊加大主修「工業組織與全球化」，為「商業管理」、「國際政治經濟及社會學」之合併研究，即將取得學土學位。最近日剛從國立臺灣大學學習「國際貿易管理」、「中文」歸來，回母校任義務教師，教「社會學」、「外籍學生英語」、「SAT與托福考試準備」，並協助管理學生宿舍。在培德女中畢業前，曾與父母居住聖城六年。其母林孫秀美女士，即孫果秀居士，曾為本城中小學撰寫《弟子規淺釋》教材，於本刊連載刊出，頗受好評。內華性好學習、旅行、善交往，工作經驗包括創辦「培德校友會」、「法界佛教青年會」。 |
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Venerable Master, Dharma Masters, fellow cultivators and students:
Many of you know me as an alumna, who lived and studied at the CTTB for six years and am now returning after getting my college degree to teach at the Girls' School for the next four months. Many of you may also have expectations of and opinions about me, such as why I came back and what kind of model I should be for the students. However, tonight, I don't want to speak on your opinions of me; I would like to speak openly and simply share my thoughts and experiences.
At the time I was a student here, I felt that life here in the CTTB was ridden with difficulties. These difficulties that I talk of are the mental kind, though of course it had its share of physical and emotional challenges. Some people may be mistakenly led into thinking that because the CTTB is a place for quiet contemplation and cultivation, they can escape from the "evil" outside world and solve their problems here. But it takes both courage and wisdom to realize that the matter of solving one's own problems lies not in changing external conditions or the environment, but in changing oneself. In fact, the Venerable Master was not kidding when he said that life here can be a harsh training for the mind, especially so for the ego. Looking back, however I still feel no end of gratitude on my part towards my parents for sending me here to study.
Over the years, I have learned more about myself than I wanted or ever expected to learn—the good, the bad, and the ugly. It's very easy to distract yourself from looking within and understanding who you are when you live in a materialistic society such as ours today. There are many distractions, such as entertainment and fun that can lead you astray. Seeking out these distractions to solve your problems doesn't really work. In actuality, it is not knowing yourself that can be the source of your problems. That is not to Bonnie Lin in the classroom. say I don't like to play and am a very serious person! Being young, I also like to play but I know my limits. With everything, we should strive to open-mindedly follow the Middle Way and not become attached to extremes.
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*課室中的林內華 Bonnie Lin in the classroom. |
My collective experiences here have helped me to keep this balance by developing what I like to call an inner core of values and beliefs that is not easily influenced or changed by external factors. Ironically, much of what I have taken from living in an isolated Buddhist monastery can be applied to every aspect of my everyday mundane life, not just once, but over and over again. I have a poem here that I first read when I was a tenth grader here at Developing Virtue School and it has impacted me very deeply. Actually, it represents my attitude and approach towards everything in life, which I've learned from living as a Buddhist. The following poem is by the famous author Rudyard Kipling, who wrote the Jungle Book.
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And—which is more—you'll be a Man, my son!
Our school may be placed within an isolated Buddhist monastic community with none of the frills of modern consumer society, but it was here that I learned to cut to the heart of what matters the most to me in life. It was here that I first learned how to build an inner core of strength and self-confidence necessary to get me through the obstacles I would be facing. It was here that I learned all the necessary skills and values to help me succeed in life and most importantly, to succeed as a person. I remember that there was a time when I was perhaps 16 years old and thought all my problems would be solved if only I could go to public school and be like all the other teenagers my age. Now, in retrospect, I feel that it was the difference that made all the difference.
Alumna Profile:
Bonnie Lin (Nei-Hua Lin) graduated from Developing Virtue Girls School in 1997. Bonnie Lin lived in the City of 10,000 Buddhas with her parents for six years before relocating to the San Francisco Bay Area when she began college in 1997. Her mother Mrs. Jennifer Lin—Upasika Guo-xiu Sun, developed curriculum for the Standards for Students text used in the elementary and secondary schools at the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas. Her lessons have been published in Vajra Bodhi Sea and have been well received.
Bonnie is expecting her B.A. degree in May from the University of California, Berkeley, in Interdisciplinary Studies. Her area of concentration is "Industrial Organizations & Globalization," which is a combination of studies from Business Administration, International Relations and Sociology. She recently returned from a fall semester study abroad program at the National Taiwan University in Taipei, Taiwan, where she studied International Business Management and Chinese. She is currently working as a volunteer teacher at Developing Virtue Secondary Girls' School, teaching Social Living, ESL and SAT/TOEFL Prep, and living as a dorm supervisor. Her efforts include co-founding the Developing Virtue Alumni and the Dharma Realm Buddhist Youth Group. Bonnie enjoys learning, traveling and interacting with people. |
