從「萬佛城」回來的二、三天後，耳邊似乎還聽得到大眾在佛堂誦經念佛的音聲。回憶那時在佛堂裡，真是好莊嚴，並且心裡也感到很平靜，好像一切煩惱都丟在萬佛城外。雖然在這兩天裡覺得有些睡眠不足，可是我學到了許多寶貴的知識和做人的道理。
譬如，在未去萬佛城的前一陣子，我家裡發生一些不如意的事，而且學業也一直倒退，使我有很多煩惱。更要不得的是，我開始怨天尤人，總覺得上天對我很不公平，給我這麼多難題。連續好幾天，我就抱著自暴自棄的態度。之前，我會將一切不公平的事，都怪到別人身上和老天爺身上，而我現在才瞭解法師們為什麼提醒我們要反省自己。因為「因果」。我現在是在受我應得的果報，也是在幫我消業障。有些人認為這種想法是消極的自我安慰方式，可是由於這觀念讓我能平靜的去面對這些困難，而不再逃避。
另外，我在小組討論時了解「孝順」是多麼的重要。「百善孝為先」，如果只知幫助別人，卻不懂得孝順自己的父母，那所有善事，都不能彌補讓父母傷心的「不孝」惡業。其實孝順父母，是隨時都要去做的，就算父母親不和，還是應該試著去化解他們之間的誤會，盡些孝心。我的父母親已離婚，現在有時就算想和母親講幾句話，也不是容易做到的事。雖然幾年沒見，難得在電話上，她也是句句叮嚀，要我好好照顧自己、注意飲食營養。而我父親更是辛苦，一方面要擔心事業，一方面還要擔心家庭，替我準備學費讀大學。為了做生意，他常奔波不停，可是每當我要搬家或有其他重要的事情，他就一定想辦法趕回來幫我忙。父母恩情實在難報，我現在唯一能做的就是－－努力做事，不要讓他們擔憂，儘量讓他們歡喜。 |
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Two or three days after the trip to the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas, the sound of the assembly reciting Sutras and chanting the Buddha's name was still echoing in my ears. It was so beautiful in the Buddha Hall, and it seemed that all my afflictions had been left behind, outside the City. Despite the lack of sleep during the two-day trip, I felt I learned a lot of valuable principles about how to be a person.
For example, I had been rather frustrated prior to the trip to the City, because of some unpleasant incidents at home and because I was falling behind in my studies. I began grumble to God for being so unfair and making life so difficult. This state of despair persisted for several days. I used to always blame everything on other people and on God, but now I understand why the Dharma Masters reminded us to reflect upon ourselves. I understand that I am simply receiving the retribution I deserve for the things I did in the past, and my karmic hindrances are being eradicated in the process. Some people might think of this as a defeatist way of consoling myself; however, this outlook has allowed me to face my problems calmly instead of trying to run away from them.
During the small group discussion, I began to realize how important filiality is. "Of all good deeds, filiality is foremost." If we help others but neglect to be filial to our parents, none of our good deeds can make up for evil karma of hurting our parents. Filiality is something we should practice all the time. Even when our parents don't get along with each other, we should try to find a way to resolve their conflict. My parents are divorced, and it's not easy for me to have a chance to talk with my mother. I haven't seen her for several years, and when I talk with her on the phone, she keeps telling me to take good care of myself and make sure I get enough nutrition. My father works very hard to support my college education and has to worry about both his job and the family. He has to make business trips often, but he always manages to return to help me out whenever I have to move or have some other important project. It is truly difficult to repay my parents' kindness. All I can do is work hard, not cause them to worry, and try my best to make them happy. |
