First of all, we should be filial to our parents and respectful to our brothers, sisters, and elders; secondly, we should be cautious in our speech and behavior and be trustworthy.
In the Confucian Analects it says: “At home one should be filial, and abroad, respectful to one’s elders.” The character ru 入 “enter” means at home, chu 出 “go out” means going out, away from home. The character ti 弟 “fraternity” was used in ancient times for the modern character ti 悌. Originally, it referred to the affection and respect that a younger brother should have for his older brother; the meaning is extended to include being respectful to elders. Our parents suffer great hardship in bearing us and bringing us up. A poem in the Book of Odes of China says:

My father gave me life; my mother nourished me,
Soothed me, raised me, helped me grow up, taught me,
Took care of me, looked after me constantly, and took me in her arms
　　wherever she went.
I wish to repay their kindness, but it is as high as the heavens.

Our fathers gave us life, and our mothers nourished us and brought us up. The word for “to nourish” has the meaning of bending over and picking up with both hands, like when our parents hold us in their arms, fearing that we will freeze in the cold or melt in the heat. They protect and cherish us as their dearest treasures, and soothe us with gentle caresses. When a baby cries, his mother gently pats him on back and coaxes him into a good mood. When he’s cranky, his mother tenderly strokes his head and pities him. How our parents love us and do their best to take care of us! They raise us by feeding and rearing us. Every mother goes through unbelievable suffering in feeding her baby, yet when she sees that baby is nourished, she forgets all about the suffering! After undergoing much hardship to bring up their child, the parents must still educate him in the principles of being a person and handling matters in the world. “Took care of me, looked after me constantly” describe how tenderly parents care for and protect their children without ever becoming weary or lax. The mother takes her child in her arms wherever she goes, not minding the inconvenience. Ah! That is how parents bring up their children!

The energy and kindness that our parents have devoted to us is as boundless as empty space. When could we ever finish repaying it? We could never finish, but we must still try our best. Thus the verse says that of all rules, filial piety is the first (literally “head”), which means the most important, just as the head is the most important part of the body. Fraternity is an extension of filial piety. Our parents gave birth to us, and so we are related to our parents as the ten fingers are related to the hands. Although some fingers are long and others are short, just as some children are good and others are not, they cannot separate from or abandon each another. Thus, only by loving and caring for our brothers and sisters can we set our parents’ hearts at ease. Our elders include our teachers, who nurture our Dharma-body and wisdom-life, as well as our relatives. Respecting our teachers and elders is equivalent to respecting our own parents. By doing so, not only do we gain benefit ourselves and bring honor to our parents, we won’t disgrace our parents by giving others cause to say that our parents don’t know how to teach their children. Therefore, filiality and fraternity are the most basic and important virtues.

After filiality and fraternity, the next virtues we should have are cautiousness and trustworthiness. Even if a person is sufficiently filial to his parents and respectful to his elders, if he does things in a reckless manner and fails to be trustworthy, not only will things go wrong for him, but he will bring trouble and disaster upon himself. That would also be considered unfilial and disrespectful. Therefore, cautiousness and trustworthiness are the next virtues we should possess.

To be continued