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「無上甚深微妙法，百千萬劫難遭遇；
我今見聞得受持，願解如來真實義。」
這首開經偈有的人也許覺得很平常，但不知為什麼我第一天念《大方廣佛華嚴經》時，聽了忽然竟哭了起來。我深深感覺自己是多麼幸運，能在末法時候學習到白淨正法--了生脫死的法。
「如是因，如是果」《華嚴經》裏重復了好多遍，我深信自己能皈依度人師菩薩--宣公上人，還可以跟著他座下出家弟子學習佛法，是有特殊的因緣。記得1995年5月在萬佛城拜了「萬佛寶懺」後，我皈依了上人。當時非常開心，但是好景不長，兩星期後上人圓寂了。我們從吉隆坡的紫雲洞
(現名觀音般若寺) 得知消息，當時感覺很悲傷，也很失望，因為我一直希望有一天能在上人眼前頂禮。
從吉隆坡紫雲洞回家的路上，我二姑丈說，「你跟同修林果廣倆真有福報，很幸運可以趕上皈依上人。你們是宣公上人在世的最後一批在家皈依弟子。」說得也是，我們確是走上了清淨大道，不再迷失方向了。
的確！要不是上人的慈悲教誨和法語開示，我的一生就會像上人所說的，具足了女人的各種習氣毛病：
心胸狹小、思想彎曲、顛倒煩惱、爭吵沒完，搞到家裏雞犬不寧，自己也不得自在，現在我知道不可以再糊裏糊塗活下去了。「以前種種譬如昨日死，以後種種譬如今日生」我要認真研究佛法；更要好好跟著上人留下的法寶，和他座下的僧眾及善知識們，一起修學佛法。
有件事讓我非常感動，那就是由萬佛城大佛殿，通往福居樓的那條小徑，是萬佛城尼師合力鋪成的；鋪好第一天，我踏著小徑走向佛殿去做早課，心裏忽然很感動。巧的是，那天正是我的生日，我不禁想著，「是巧合，或是上人善巧方便的禮物？」我默默感恩地接受了這份珍貴的禮物。
這條小徑是用灰色和紅色磚塊砌成的，堅固踏實，是一條菩提路；整齊的磚塊，就如同上人的三大宗旨、六大條款，有系統地等著我去體悟、修行。在接觸佛法前，我很注重自己的生日，現在我體悟到，我們每過一個生日，不知不覺中就滅了一年的壽命。我必須勤念彌陀聖號，橫超三界；修行普賢十大行願，迴向極樂世界；
讀誦修學《華嚴經》及大乘經典，才得上品上生： 唯有這樣來報答佛陀及上人的恩德。
「人身難得，佛法難聞
」，當願十方三世一切諸佛不忘本願，慈悲攝受法界一切眾生，永不退轉，直至佛果。適值時上人涅槃七週年，特撰此文，以表思念之情。
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The unsurpassed, deep, profound, subtle and
wonderful Dharma,
In hundreds of thousands of millions of eons, is difficult
to encounter; I now see and hear it, receive and uphold it,
And I vow to fathom the Tathagata's true and actual meaning.
This "Verse for Opening a Sutra" may seem
very ordinary to most people. However, on the first day of
the Avatamsaka Dharma Assembly in 1999, when we recited this
verse, I cried for no obvious reason. Deep inside me, I felt
that I was most fortunate to be able to learn the Orthodox
Dharma for ending birth and death in this Dharma Ending Age.
"As is the cause, so is the effect"--this
is reiterated many times in the Avatamsaka Sutra. I truly
believe that there were special causes and conditions that
enabled me to take refuge with the Venerable Master, and to
learn the Buddhadharma from his left-home disciples. I took
refuge with the Venerable Master in May 1995 after
completing the 10,000 Buddhas Jeweled Repentance Ceremony.
At that time I was very happy, but the happiness did not
last. Barely two weeks later, we received news from Tze Yun
Tung Temple (now known as Guanyin Sagely Monastery in Kuala
Lumpur, Malaysia, that the Venerable Master had entered
Nirvana. I was deeply saddened on hearing the news. I also
felt very disappointed because all this while, I had been
harboring hopes that one day, I would be able to bow to the
Venerable Master in person.
On our way home from Kuala Lumpur, my
uncle remarked, "Both you and Raymond are so fortunate to
become the Venerable Master's disciples, because you are in
the last group of lay disciples in his lifetime." Indeed
this is true, for we are walking on the Pure Great Path and
will not be misled again.
It is also true that if it were not for
the Venerable Master's compassionate teachings and
instructional talks, my life would still be fraught with the
habits and shortcomings of a woman, such as pettiness,
distorted thoughts, afflictions and endless squabbles. These
caused unhappiness not only to myself, but also to my
family. Now, I know that I must not live the rest of my life
in this muddled state. Whatever happened in the past is
gone; whatever happens in the future is born today.
Therefore, I must investigate the Buddhadharma seriously.
Moreover, I must treasure the Venerable Master's Dharma
jewels and learn from his left-home disciples and all good
knowing advisors.
There was one incident that moved me
deeply. It was the little path that led from the Buddha Hall
to the Tower of Blessings. This path was constructed by the
nuns. On the day it was completed, I walked along it to go
to the Buddha Hall for morning recitation, when I suddenly
realized that it was my birthday. What a coincidence! Or was
it the Venerable Master's expedient gift? Silently, I
accepted this very precious gift with gratitude.
This little path is constructed of gray
and red bricks. It is a very strong and sturdy Bodhi road.
The red bricks are laid out in a very orderly manner, just
like the Venerable Master's Three Great Rules and Six
Guiding Principles, waiting for me to fathom and cultivate
them. Before encountering the Buddhadharma, I paid special
attention to my birthday every year. Now, I realize that
each time we celebrate our birthdays, our life spans have
also imperceptibly decreased by one year. I must vigorously
recite Amitabha Buddha's name in order to transcend the
Triple Realm, cultivate and practice Universal Worthy
Bodhisattva's Ten Great Vows and transfer the merit to
rebirth in the Land of Ultimate Bliss. I must also recite
and cultivate according to the Avatamsaka Sutra and other
Mahayana Sutras so that I can be reborn in the upper
superior grade of lotuses. By practicing in this way, I will
be able to repay the great kindness of the Buddha and the
Venerable Master.
The human body is difficult to obtain,
The Buddhadharma is difficult to encounter.
May the Buddhas of the three periods of
time not forget their original vows, and compassionately
gather in all living beings, so that they may bring forth an
irreversible Bodhi mind till they accomplish Buddhahood. I
have written this article in remembrance of the Venerable
Master on the occasion of the seventh anniversary of his
Nirvana.
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